


Respect

by orphan_account



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Ableism, Agni Kai (Avatar), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Blind!Zuko (Avatar), Burns, Canonical Child Abuse, Child Abuse, Gen, Honor, Hurt Zuko (Avatar), Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Iroh (Avatar) is a Good Uncle, Ozai (Avatar) Being a Terrible Parent, Ozai (Avatar) is an Asshole, Prison, Sort Of, The Fire Nation (Avatar) is Ableist, Zuko Says Something in the War Meeting from Book 3, Zuko's Scar (Avatar), idk which one but its sad so buckle up, internalized ableism, it doesnt end well, ming isnt even a big character in avatar but she radiates lesbian energy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-07-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:07:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24958108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Zuko didn't want to stay silent. He paid the price.He never learns, does he?(OR: the one where Zuko doesn't stay quiet at that one war meeting in Book 3 and history repeats itself)
Relationships: Iroh & Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 47
Kudos: 448





	1. Failed Teachings

“The Earth Kingdom is strong. They don’t let anything bring them down,” Zuko had said. He knew from experience. He smiled at the memory, but dropped it once he brought himself back to the present. “So we’ll just destroy what makes them strong, then. Burn everything they know to the ground,” Ozai mused. “That’s-That’s not what I meant,” Zuko sputtered, But Ozai just looked at him and gave him a sickening grin. “Oh?”

Zuko shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Azula smirked at him. “What did you mean?” Ozai taunted. Zuko stuttered, fiddling with his hands. “Go on,” Azula prompted. “Tell us. What did you mean?”

Taking a deep breath and clenching his fists, Zuko blinked. “I-I just meant we shouldn’t, uh, we shouldn't try to break something that’ll fix itself-” “Are you sure?” Ozai cut him off, eyebrows furrowed in anger. “Or are you still just a traitor?” Zuko flinched back. “I- no,” he said, shaking in his seat. “I’m not.”

“It seems you didn’t learn. You never do. Your punishment wasn’t enough,” Ozai mused. Zuko’s eyes widened. “...Your suffering wasn’t enough,” Ozai scowled at his child, who was now hyperventilating where he sat. “It’s time you finally learned the respect it was supposed to teach you. Agni Kai. Same time. Same place. Tomorrow. You can’t refuse.”

\---

The day passed quickly. Zuko wasn’t ready when tomorrow came. He never would be. Why couldn’t he just keep his mouth shut? This is all his fault. It always has been. He brought this on himself. He took shaky steps with his equally shaky legs out into the mat and shed the fabric draped around his shoulders.

He looked at the ground and met no one in the eye. He didn’t want to see Azula smiling in anticipation. He didn’t want to see his people excited for his downfall. He couldn’t fight his father. This isn’t a matter of will. He’s not strong enough. It’ll give his father reason to kill. 

He had to surrender again. He knew the outcome wouldn’t be good either way, but... it’s dishonorable to kill someone who surrendered, and he’d take branding over death any day.

He fell to his knees.

\---

The fire nation guards’ gloved hands had held onto the former prince’s arms, supporting his shaking legs as they dragged him along to his cell. A cell with a very familiar path. _Uncle_ , Zuko’s mind supplied. He prayed to Agni he was right. 

He heard the creaking of a metal door opening. The guards dragged him further inside as the door closed back up. They opened the cell door and shoved Zuko down. The room looked like an unfocussed camera lense. The only clue he had gotten that the guards had left was the creaking of that same metal door.

On his knees once more, _Burning fire eating at his rotting flesh,_ Zuko studied the room. He couldn’t see much, but he did recognize the blotches of color. He thought that it could just be another cell, considered how they’re all styled similarly, but his eyes came to a figure, crumpled over where it sat. What he assumed was gray hair spilled out onto the floor.

“Uncle,” Zuko’s wavering voice said from across the jail cell, desperately looking up at the blurry blob that might be Iroh. He isn’t sure. He can’t tell. He just hopes. “Please, I-” his voice broke as his eyes filled with salty tears, dripping down his face and he was _in the arena and people were laughing and watching and-_

“I messed up, Uncle,” he cried, voice raw from screaming. “So bad. And I’m so, so sorry. Please just-” Zuko swallowed. His knees hurt. His lungs hurt. Talking hurt. Everything hurt. _And he was burning and his face, oh Agni, his face hurt-_ “...Don’t...hurt...me…” he managed to rasp through heaving sobs. Iroh grabbed his clothing. He flinched, _Course hands dragging him as he screamed and he screamed,_ but soon felt the warm embrace of his uncle’s arms around him. He slowly rose his shaky arms and returned the hug, crying into his uncle’s shoulder.

There was no need for words. They understood each other perfectly fine. Iroh tried to pull away to say something, or ask something, but Zuko clinged onto him and held on tighter. Iroh gave in.

Zuko felt Iroh’s chest rise and fall as he sighed. “...What happened, Prince Zuko?” he asked, solemnly, eyes downcast. “I never learn,” Zuko responded. “I did it again. I shouldn’t have said anything. This is all my fault.” _Fire growing stronger and stronger as it licked away his skin-_ Zuko’s arms loosened as he spoke, but tightened again once he blamed himself. Iroh pulled away. Zuko didn’t resist as his uncle’s face went pale at the sight of him.

The scar remained unchanged, skin numb and leathery, but the other side wasn’t the same. Where normal skin once lay was now too smooth and slick as an angry burn enveloped his face from eye to ear. Salty tears spilled down it, leaving a trail of pain in its wake as Zuko cried, A never ending cycle. He cries, it hurts, and the pain starts it all over again. “It’s never different, is it?” he asked, choking on his words. “Never, never.”

Iroh brought a hand up to his mouth and surrounded his nephew in a hug again. He needed it. “You didn’t deserve that,” Iroh muttered. “No one deserves that.” Zuko tilted his head. “But didn’t I? I should’ve learned the first time,” he sobbed. “There was nothing to learn. You were right,” his uncle reassured him. “Your father is a cruel man. What he did was wrong. So very wrong.” Uncle Iroh took a deep breath. “It’s like your tears. You cry and it hurts so you cry more and blame yourself, but who made you cry in the first place?”

There was a beat of silence between the two, Zuko’s muffled sobs being the only thing to be heard. “...Can you see okay?” Iroh asked. Zuko was quiet. He closed his mobile eye. _No. No I can’t and it’s so weak. It’s wrong. How can you fight when you can’t see?_ he thought. “What does it matter?” he spat, eye opening, the other jammed shut. Iroh hummed in response. “It doesn’t. I met a strong bender who couldn’t see, just as capable as everyone else,” he mused. Zuko looked at the blurred ground. _The Avatar’s earthbender,_ he realized. “...No,” he replied. “No, I can’t, and I feel so vulnerable.”

“Don’t,” Iroh said, pulling away from the hug once more. “A badgermole can not see where it goes, but it makes the journey no different.” Zuko let out a breath of warm air and tried to understand what his uncle had meant, but gave up as he usually did. “But it-” His uncle interrupted him. “But nothing. “You are not weak.” There was a pause.

“Your father is.”


	2. Lessons Learned

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko, meet Ming.

As the sun broke the dark night and lit up the sky, Zuko rose, only to find his uncle had awakened much earlier. The fuzzy image that was Iroh was not in its usual place that it had taken the night before. The creaking of prison bars echoed in Zuko’s ears. “Uncle, what are you doing?” Zuko asked with a raspy voice, looking in no particular direction. There wasn’t really much of a point in straining his one open eye, since it was early morning and still somewhat dark. The slight black tint to his vision wasn’t helping much, either.

“Exercising,” he heard his uncle respond from somewhere above him. Zuko blinked. Or... winked? He wasn’t quite sure what blinking with one eye jammed shut was called. He held back a cough. “...Why?” he asked. He doubted food rations would be very great here, why work it all off? His uncle took a minute to respond. “...Because a healthy body is a healthy mind-” “-You’re gonna break out on the eclipse?” Zuko interrupted him, lowering his voice for both privacy and to make talking easier. Iroh sighed and the small thud Zuko heard made it clear he had jumped to the floor. “I’m gonna break out during the eclipse.” 

Zuko nodded. “We can not stay together when it’s done, though,” Uncle said. Zuko was taken aback, but he didn’t say anything. He had screamed and inhaled too much smoke just the other day, not to mention it was morning. “The avatar needs you. Ba Sing Se needs me,” Iroh mused. “We will meet again.”

Then there was a hand in Zuko’s shoulder.  _ Dragging him up as the smell wafted into his nose-  _ The hand pulled back, as if whispering a message of regret and apologies. He took a deep breath and turned around, trying to snap himself out of his panicked… thoughts? They didn’t seem like thoughts, but there was no better word.  _ So that’s where he is,  _ Zuko noted.

Suddenly, just as it seemed there would be a nice moment of peace and quiet, the sound of a door opening caught Zuko’s attention. “General Iroh, I-” the guard said. There was a clang as, Zuko assumed, she dropped whatever she was holding. “...So it’s true,” she started. “The prince is here.”

Zuko nodded, hoping he was looking in the right direction. He wasn’t, but the effort was there. The guard made to pick up her tray. Uncle looked at her. “Ah, Zuko, this is Ming,” he explained. It did not explain things. The sound of footsteps rang through the room as Ming walked closer and kneeled down in front of the cell. “I brought you some jasmine tea, I know you like rare teas, oh, and I heard the prince was here, so…” She held out a small white object. Zuko, confused, reached out to grab it. At first, he overshot a little too much to the left, but he eventually reached it. The texture was course. It was thick, wrapped over multiple times.  _ Bandages,  _ Zuko realized. He wrapped his hands around them and pulled them into the cell. 

There was a pause as Zuko mulled over how he could convey what he wanted to say without damaging his vocal chords. At least, any more than they already had been. He eventually began to give the bandages back to Ming, but she pushed them back. “No, keep them,” she said, resigned as she looked at the ground. “I don’t have any burn salve, but they should keep dirt out.” The room went quiet as her face went sullen. “...My girlfriend was in the 41st division.” Zuko dropped the bandages. His grip had already been weak, but that pushed him over the edge. He needs to say something, even if it would hurt. He had failed her. “...I’m sorry,” was all he could croak out through a sore throat, before delving straight into a coughing fit. 

It hurt. Tears pricked at the corners of his eyes. Ming looked up, surprise evident on her face, as Iroh put his hand on Zuko’s back and stretched his arm over his chest to keep him from falling over until he stopped coughing. He felt around for the bandages that he had dropped on the floor to no avail.

“Don’t apologize,” Ming said, grasping the bandages that had fallen by his knee and pressing them into his hand through the bars. “You did all you could.” Zuko felt her hand leave his and wrapped his fingers around the bandages once more, his thumb rubbing on the interesting texture. It felt oddly nice, compared to the floor. The floor was smooth, too smooth, and the dust and dirt always stuck to his hands. Not to mention the only other thing was his clothing, and that always made him cringe when it rubbed together. The bandages were new. Different. 

Zuko nodded as he heard Ming begin to walk away. The footsteps grew fainter and fainter until there was a click as the door closed. He handed his uncle the bandages as he began to wrap the wound, it stinging with every layer as the coarse fabric rubbed against his raw skin. He wasn’t sure he liked the texture so much anymore.

\---

It had been three days since then, each passing in a repetitive cycle. They woke up, Iroh exercised, Ming delivered their food with some nice conversations, Iroh re-bandaged Zuko’s eye, Iroh exercised, and they would sleep. Sometimes, Iroh would almost get caught as a guard went to check up on them. He never did, though, pretending to be insane whenever one came in. It worked surprisingly well.

There had been no visits from their family. Zuko sat and thought to himself, the faint creaking of prison bars serving as background noise as Iroh climbed on them. It didn’t take Zuko long to realize that they never visited because they didn’t care. Deep down, he always knew. It was a thought that had begun to dig itself up ever since he was first scarred but now… knowing it? It felt easier when he didn't. When he believed he had deserved it, that it was his punishment. No one wants to admit that their own father despises them. But he had, and it didn’t make it any easier.

Ming came again, this time with two extra bowls of rice. Iroh had pulled it in as Zuko decided to try and at least say something. He had to speak eventually if he was going to convince the avatar to let him teach him how to bend. “...Thank you,” he croaked out. His eye widened somewhat. There was no coughing fit or anything, his throat just hurt a little and felt dry. 

“Do not strain your voice, Nephew,” Iroh said, placing the bowls down and thanking Ming. “...You don’t look well,” he said to her. “I feel fine,” she responded, but he reaffirmed what he had said. “No, no, you have been working hard today. You should take the day off.” Ming looked at him and nodded as she walked out the door and closed it.


End file.
